As I promised, here it comes the second part of the Pshychology of Love. We will discuss now about the chances to fall in love with someone or someone to fall in love with you 😉
There are 7 variables devided in 2 categories: The big 3 and The more interesting 4. So, let’s start!
The BIG 3:
1. All other things being equal. It’s an interesting thing in here because you can actually measure (in meters/feet, etc) with who it’s the great possibility to fall in love with. Example: the doors in the student dorm are very close one to another, so the possiblity of a future relationship is bigger there comparing to…let’s say, the sky-scrapers, where distance is big.
2. Similarity. People more similar have more possibilities to fall in love. So if you both like the same music gender, enjoy same movies, have the same religion, same political view, same point of view about homosexuality, etc., you have more chances to fall in love with that person.
Very important!!! Opposites don’t really attract!!! So if you have nothing in common with you partner, it’s very probable that your relationship won’t work very well.
3. Familiarity. The more you know that person, the more likely is to fall in love with he/she. For example, if you make eye contact with a random girl on the street once, twice or whatever, it doesn’t mean she likes you. She wants to see who is coming. That’s all. But if you see that girl more days in a row, maybe you will start talking, so you became more familiar to her. The chances of a relationship grow.
The More Interesting 4:
1. Confidence. We are attracted to people who are competent, but not very competent because we consider them superior to us and that’s not good for a future relationship.
2. Physical attractiveness. Even if nobody wants to admit, this is the most important factor of a relationship. If you don’t like that person, you definitely don’t want a relationship with her. The truth is that we care more about what an attractive person said.
3. Gain/ Loss. Here is an interesting thing: the haters can’t hurt you anymore because you know their attitude won’t change, also, we don’t appreciate too much the persons who are always positive (like saying “I love you! I love you!” all day long). We prefer what’s called “the game effect“: the person who doesn’t appreciate you from the start, but she appreciates you after a period of time.
3. Mistake understood as love. I consider this the most interesting one. For example if your ate wants decaffeinated, but, by mistake, she gets normal coffee. The caffeine makes the heartbeat to increase and it can be understand as love.
Fear can be also understood as love. Take your date to a horror movie or go near a cemetery. The heartbeats increase again because of the fear an it can be understood as love.
Domestic violence. you stay in an abusive relationship either because economically there’s no other solution or because of misunderstood love (“He won’t yell/ beat me if he won’t love me!”)
Hope this things will help you. This series will continue because it’s a very complex subject. Hope you will enjoy it! Also, if you have questions, please ask. If you like it, share it!
If you missed the first part of the article, here it is: